Facing up to life with a little help from my trainers and even more help from my friends.

The last couple of months have been a bit of a rollercoaster, with far more downwards sloping stretches of track than up. Many tears have been shed but I’m feeling more positive than ever right now even though the situations around me haven’t really changed. The only thing that has changed is the way I am dealing with problems that I now realise are completely out of my control. Life throws many challenges your way and sometimes you have to decide which problems are yours to fix. I have a tendency to try and carry the world on my shoulders but sometimes you have to realise you can’t fix everything.

You may have read about my first big running challenge when I ran the Paris half marathon back in March with Team Bangs on the Run. When I returned, I basked in the excitement for a little too long and before it even dawned on me I was taking an extended unplanned break from my running. The longer I left it, the harder it got to throw the trainers back on and life just managed to get in the way. It felt a little bit like when you lose weight and get excited. You start with a little bit of chocolate and then a bit more and the weight creeps back on so you’re as fat as you were to start with and you just give up altogether. I was still thinking about running but the problem was I just wasn’t actually doing much of it. Work got busier and I ended up staying in the office longer leaving little time for running.  As the exercise diminished, I got more sluggish and lethargic so I signed up to the Run To The Beat half marathon to set my sights on a new challenge. 

Look at these babies for motivation. Designed by me and won at Run Dem Crew courtesy of Nike ID

I had good intentions but it seemed that every time I cried, a little more of my running mojo was being lost leaving me empty. I tried so hard but I just couldn’t enjoy it. Running can be a solitary business and I usually thrive on the alone time. I like my own company and sometimes it’s refreshing to just say nothing which is quite a change for me. However, while I was feeling down I just wasn’t really enjoying the ‘me’ time and couldn’t motivate myself.

I had considered joining Run Dem Crew for a while but I live in Barnes and they run in Shoreditch. Fairly far in distance terms but even further apart in culture. I’m not cool enough to hang with the handlebar moustached, vintage-wearing cool kids in Shoreditch but I knew that running on my own wasn’t working. I headed over to RDC with a couple of my other running buddies a couple of months back and I haven’t looked back. It is seriously one of the best things I have done this year and I’m pleased to say there have been no handlebar tashes in sight. Just a group of amazingly positive people that make you feel welcome every week and encourage you to push yourself a little bit more. And yes, Barnes and Shoreditch are a fair distance apart but it's worth the journey!

 I ran Run To The Beat and against all the odds I actually finished on a course that was way more hilly and far hotter than I had ever anticipated.  It is traditional for Rum Dem Crew founder Charlie Dark to award members of the RDC with their race medals at the session following the run. Tuesday 27^th September was a special night and it was on that night that I realised just how special RDC is to me. As Charlie told inspirational stories about himself and shared anecdotes about the achievements of other RDC members whilst presenting them with their medals, a tear rolled down my cheek. It was a different type of tear. Not sadness but happiness, positivity and a whole lot of proud all rolled in to one. It was at that moment I realised that in the time since I had joined RDC the sad tears I had been crying had stopped.

I look way happier than I actually am here.

It wasn’t that the sad things had gone away but I’d been distracted and focused in a positive way. The inspirational stories and positive vibes are infectious and you can’t help but leave RDC with a beaming smile. The combination of a sense of achievement, the rush of endorphins and the opportunity to hang out with some seriously inspiring people forces you to crack more than a smile and it makes you re-evaluate things. I look forward to Tuesdays and I know that each week I will get the chance to meet with friends and meet new friends. Not only that but I am loving my running again too. The running keeps me sane at a time where things around me are slightly crazy. I know it can be hard to actually put the trainers on and get out the door but nothing beats the sense of freedom or the feeling of achievement when you’re done. Before a lot of runs I do have that niggle of ‘shall I just go home and throw myself on the sofa?’ but I ignore it because I know how amazing I will feel after the run.  The more I run, the more energy I have and the happier I am so I’m just going to keep running.

Running is a metaphor for life. It is important to set yourself goals in life and when you really put your mind to it you can achieve whatever you want. If you don’t set challenges then you’ll just drift along with no sense of purpose. There are some things in life that you have no control over but you do have the power to change your behaviour. I realise now that it’s a waste of time and energy stressing over things that you can’t change. Instead put that energy to good use and use any reserve you do have left to support those around you that may need it.  Life will be much happier. I’m still there for those around me as much as I can be but by focusing on my running goals I’m much happier and I’m pretty sure I’m more fun to be around. Thank you Run Dem Crew for helping me find my running mojo. The next challenge on the agenda  is Mo Running in Greenwich Park on 12^th November and I will be seriously disappointed if I fail to see a handlebar moustache that day.

I am loving life right now!

I will be honest with you. I’m a little bored of the negative facebook status updates and tweets I have seen throughout today. People moaning about the holiday being over too quick, back to work tomorrow and whatever else they can find to be miserable about . Blah blah blah! Life is too short. I am completely understanding of the ‘back to school’ feeling as I still get Sunday night fear every week but I am pretty sure there are plenty more positive things we could all be saying. I am going to buck today’s trend, be different and tell you all why I’m loving life.

On New Year’s Day 2010, my boyfriend and I were walking back to my best friend’s house in Sheen to collect our car and we had serious New Year’s Eve induced hangovers. I grew up in SW14 and I still have a special place in my heart for South West London. At the time we were living in the sticks out near Heathrow. I was keen to move back. My friends are here, my family are here and I just love the area but I didn’t want to be seen as the bossy girlfriend that moves her boyfriend to live next door to everybody in her life. Much to my delight when I asked Jon what he thought of the area he declared he would quite like to live here. Green light! By the time we’d rocked up to Lucy’s we had given ourselves 6 months to find a new home in Mortlake or Barnes. Wahoo!

We moved to Barnes in May and it’s the best thing we have done in a long while. Running gives you a lot of time to think and whilst out on my day 3 Janathon run I had a little think about why I love Barnes. There are so many things that I like it would be really hard to say it all in to one post. Here are just a few of the things that helped me through my super painful 6k run today.

I love being close to my friends and family in amazing surroundings. When it snowed I went to Richmond Park with my sister, boyfriend and niece. Richmond Park is beautiful and is one of my favourite places. If you haven’t been then go. The Isabella Plantation is just amazing in Spring time. I’ve put some of our Richmond Park snow pics below.

I love living close to Barnes pond and to my best friend Lucy. We also took advantage of the snow and hung out at Barnes Pond to build a snow deer with her husband Paul. I like to be different! Excuse the ugly stain down my jacket. Among the excitement, I managed to spill coffee all down myself. Ihave mentioned before that I am a bit of a secret geek. I’m a wanna be birdwatcher (yes,really) so any opportunity to do a bit of twitching I’m there. Check out the coots between Lucy and I. If we met it's probably not the first thing you'd guess was a hobby of mine.

When I was running today, I have to admit I did have to stop to stretch my poor legs. They were screaming at me by the time I got to the Mall in Chiswick after 5 days of running. In fact they were screaming at me before I even left home. I was going to go out straight after breakfast but my bed was too much of a temptation. It was my last chance for a lay-in so lay in I did and finally set off at 1:00 this afternoon. Today’s run was tough but I kept telling myself how lucky I am to have the opportunity to run in such a beautiful area. Below is Barnes Bridge where I start my run and the other picture is one I took today when I reached Hammersmith Bridge. This is the halfway point in my 6k run and when the bridge comes into view it makes me smile. When I saw the Heron I just had to stop to take a snap. I kept on straight away though with no walk breaks but I have to admit it was really hard.

When I got to Lonsdale road that runs parallel to the towpath, I was so close to stopping for a break but Stonebridge, Put ‘em high came on my I-Pod. It’s Lucy’s favourite song and gave me the boost I needed to power on through. I felt so good when Barnes Bridge was in sight and when I finished I took a moment to just sit and look at the river. Despite my sore muscles I was beaming from ear to ear.

When you glance to the left of Barnes Bridge you see the White Hart Pub. I think it's actually officially called ye White Hart but I feel a but stupid saying that. It’s a fab pub and they are on Twitter too.(@WhiteHartBarnes) Barnes has some great pubs that are brilliant for catching up with friends and I even managed to get my Mum and Dad down to the White Hart with my sister and friends on Christmas eve to have a birthday drink with me. Mum and Dad aren't your typical pub type so it was great to have them there.

Being a wanna be twitcher I love that the London Wetlands centre is just down the road from where I live. I persuaded Jon to come for a walk there this afternoon as we are actually members. It really is incredible that such a nature reserve exists in London and we saw swans, diving ducks and even a crane. They have an ‘introduction to birdwatching’ course in February  and I am seriously tempted.Despite my two  bird handbooks, my twitcher knowledge is just not up to scratch.

I love living in a place where you know people in the community. When out and about I normally bump into somebody I know. Despite being in London, Barnes has a real village feel. We even have a farmers market on a Saturday and it’s quite likely you’ll catch me there salivating over the amazing food.  After the wetland centre walk today I bumped into one of the Team Bangs on the Run girls out on her run. Gemma was going for it. Another thing I love is seeing people with a target and working hard to acheive it. Seeing all the the Team Bangs on the Run updates and faboulous support we have receivedso far has been great. Thank you to everybody that has supported us and donated so far. We really do appreciate it and it is definitely helping me with my training. 

Another thing that I am loving right now is my Kindle that was a joint present from my brother and sister. It is amazing! I love the way that that you can turn the pages at the click of a button even when you are holding it in just one hand. The final thing that makes me really happy is that despite being ill for most of it, I managed to have a brilliant Christmas spending time with our  friends and family. I even managed to squeeze in a 'Christmas day' dinner with my friends on 28th December.

 I could go on and on here about things that I love but I think this is enough love for one post. Come on guys, before you post another miserable and negative status have a good hard think. I don’t want to sound preachy but there will always be somebody that is in a more unfortunate position than yourself. Think of something positive to say, embrace life and if you are unhappy then try and change things for the better.